parenting, continued...

Calvin ran a small fever today, and went down to sleep easy but a little restless. So both times I came home today (from work, and then from Yoga), he woke up unhappy. Normally we would both struggle to leave him alone and let him remember how to put himself back to sleep, but I felt like a big, loud, dorky, baby-waker, so I went in to get him. I am weak in this way. No resolve.

All of these things happened both times I went in: He was sitting up in bed, talking and crying but not really screaming, pacifiers juuuuust out of reach, and so helpless and sad. I scooped him up, tucked his little silk blankie next to his face, plugged him with plastic, and sat down to rock. He sighs, deeply, clutches the blanket to his face, reaches up to scratch his glorious ginger colored curly head, and goes inert but aware in my arms. We sat in the rocker for maybe 5 or 10 minutes me murmuring and humming songs ("Irish lullaby" and "Shenandoah", as it happens), and he barely moved, he was so tired. He fussed for 2 seconds the first time I laid him back in bed, after work, but this evening he went back down like...well, like a sleeping baby.

Amazing how useful you can feel over something so brief, innit? Anyway, late now, done working, off to bed.

(no subject)

Karen Hoofnagle's "Speaking of Nonsense" blog is now syndicated at karen_bot, for those of you who might be interested in such news.